It had been a while since I saw you last, and all I could think was how much I looked forward to seeing you again. We don’t see each other often, and it’s probably better this way, but after a rough couple of weeks overseas, seeing you lifted my spirits. Honestly, the past several months have been somewhat complicated, and my life has been far more offbeat than usual.
The last time we met was amid all the chaos and unhappiness I felt, but I don’t remember mentioning much about it to you. If I had, I’m sure I would’ve said things I could never take back. Instead, I was glad to have shared a passionate discussion about film and music. It was a welcome distraction. You always know what to do or say when I’m feeling down. At that time, it was friendship in the form of shared hobbies – in the joy of the art we love and in silent listenings of JVKE and Polyphia through your earphones.
I was glad to see you again last week.
It was not so nice arriving first because it meant spending more time in my least favourite suburb than I had to, but I knew I could also count on you to arrive early. We probably got around 10 minutes to catch up before the others came. Though I’m not sure since I haven’t been in the habit of checking time lately, and time seems to fly away when I’m around you because you’re just that good of a conversationalist.
You know, I don’t really remember the last time I felt an unfading happiness. For several months, any kind of delight I experienced was temporary and quickly eaten away by melancholia. But having gone with you to see Polyphia changed this. And I was overjoyed to have received your invitation. In hindsight, I don’t know how to explain how grateful I am for you because words would never seem like enough. It always seems like you’re around at a good time, and I am so thankful to God for you.
The whole night left me in a state of euphoria. From the excitement of hearing Genesis played as the opener to the perpetual high of hearing Euphoria as the final song, I loved it all. Even the jetlag couldn’t contain my excitement. There were so many things I wanted to say and rave about, but I was still in shock. The words I wanted to speak only presented in the same few words, “I had so much fun” or “I had the best time”. For the better half of a week, the post-concert high took hold of me so much that I couldn’t concentrate at work the next day. All I could think about was that night.
Admittedly, I think I got a little too sentimental. It was confusing. Though, that’s probably to be expected when someone runs face-first into danger to chase after you. The feeling of being pursued is something I haven’t experienced in a while, but it’s a comforting reminder of how God did this for us first. It made me really happy you followed me into the throes of a metal mosh pit.
So while I’m used to your thoughtfulness and the way you love the people around you, I couldn’t imagine you running face-first into danger for me, especially when a metal mosh doesn’t seem like your cup of tea. But why you wouldn’t leave me alone to fend for myself makes more sense. It led me to realise there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for the people you love, and I’m elated to be someone who has experienced the weight of your love in more ways than one.
Thanks to you, I remember what it’s like to love life and to have God love me for me. And I also remember my inherent, possibly unhinged, desire for death-defying circumstances to feel alive. Sharing this new experience together is something I’ll never forget, and I will treasure this memory forever.
I would absolutely do it all over again. And I just wanted to say, thank you for being you.
P.S. I still stand by what I’ve said in the past. You’re the most creative person I’ve ever met, and someday I hope to hold a candle to your thoughtfulness and creativity. Thank you for adding colour to my life once more.
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