I don’t like liars… but who does?
After all, they are as cunning as they are dishonest.
They are selfish and greedy.
And never do what they have promised.
Some liars are cowards.
For they fool themselves into believing they are good.
And he fooled you too.
But just because he could, it didn’t mean he should.
They hurt the people around them so easily.
Even if they don’t really mean to do it.
Yet, justifying each lie and decision to hide away.
And you could not tell where his mind and mouth split.
So what do liars do when things get hard?
They run, run, run away.
Slowly, they tiptoe off into the darkness.
And even then, what is there to say?
Accusations are only met with defensive counters.
And the truth is never told.
Perhaps you are overthinking it.
Is he really pulling one over you like a blindfold?
Have you caught him in a lie for sure, or are you just being insecure?
They reassure you that they will talk to you later.
And gently tell you that the conversation will return.
But you have learnt that later never comes.
And in your need for clarity, all you can do is yearn.
Like clockwork, this happens again and again.
Your mind spirals further the more it transpires.
You are not safe since his mouth speaks lies.
And it is clear you can no longer put out the fires.
How can you stop your heart from racing?
Your lungs still choke on air in this deadly dance.
His little white lie became an endless twist of the knife.
And you foolishly gave him too many a chance.
So why did you keep fighting?
They will never come back to you.
Liars will lie to keep the peace.
The peace that was never yours—only his.
Hence, the nightmares would never cease.
This was a coward who turned into a liar.
But couldn’t you tell that something was amiss?
With every word that left his mouth, you hoped his lies were true.
Yet, every disappointment threw you further into the abyss.
He convinced himself he was brave and stayed.
He stayed when he had every opportunity to leave.
And there were so many opportunities.
Was it brave to try again after every fight, or was it cowardice?
Was he just convincing himself he wasn’t a coward?
Then why continue to have one foot out the door?
Why continue to chase other women and lie?
On the way home, you sat in the back of a little car filled with cardboard.
All the while, revisiting your past in the wake of another’s (self-inflicted) misfortune.
And somehow, your friend helps you come to a realisation—something you should have had a long time ago.
She provided her recollection of a story I told a long time ago.
A forgotten memory, and a stark reminder of a way he betrayed my trust.
And how could I forget?
Because it is easy to forget a single slight in a sea of many other wrongs.
It’s just the way it goes.
Your heart sinks at the recollection of yet another hurt, only this time you just sigh and accept it.
And you laugh to yourself, for the only reason you’re not breaking down is that he inflicted worse upon you.
He hurt you far more than that and betrayed you so easily.
And silly you for believing in him.
I know it makes you sad, but you’re so much happier away from the man who could only hurt you and the people around him.
That little talk in the car was a blessing.
A gentle revelation… that it never would have worked out.
No matter how much you loved him, and no matter how hard you fought to keep it alive, building castles with someone who runs away with every stone you put down is impossible.
Building a life with someone who runs away from the truth and does not know how to be honest will never work.
He hid so much information from you.
Even when it wasn’t about the other women…
That, too, is a betrayal of your trust.
Your relationship was built on a shaky foundation of his lies and cowardice.
It was a sandcastle at the edge of the water just waiting to crumble.
You don’t like liars, but you loved a liar.
Saw so much good in him when he couldn’t see it himself.
Fought battles on your own so as not to “halve his ministry”.
Made yourself smaller to fit into his world.
And gave away too much to just “let it go”.
But he never chose you.
There was always something else on the horizon, more appealing to his eyes.
Where was he when you needed him?
Anywhere but with you.
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